Courage is my one word for 2017 and it takes courage to allow yourself to transform and to grow. Change is not easy. New normal's are hard. But it's worth it. I promise it is worth it.
I have done a million diets in the past. This program is not a diet!!!!!! That has been the key for me. Precision Nutrition has helped me change my mind set, trust myself, and change my relationship with food. I have learned to face truths, process emotions and circumstances without the crutch of food. I have shared in my posts before, I am binge eater, that is one reason I wanted the help of PN Coaching. Many times in my life I could not control what was happening around me or to me, but I could control food. I had to change what I have always done, I abused food and then found a diet to try to control food...that cycle never worked. Precision Nutrition has helped me change what I have always done and break the cycle. I confess, I am still under construction, but the foundation I have been given will continue to build transformation. I feel like food does not have a grasp on me, I have a grasp on it. I no longer feel shame and guilt when eating certain foods and there is so much freedom in that.
During my year my blood pressure was running high and I was on the verge of having to take meds. I am no longer on that verge. My asthma and allergies are more controlled. I am consistent with workouts and even with my "bad" knees I am running.
In the past year I read a book titled Present Over Perfect, the author Shauna Niequist spoke directly to me as I read her words and as I was transforming with my coaching, this book helped me change as well. She writes "Addiction to motion-or faking or busyness or obsessive eating or obsessive dieting or whatever it is for you-build just a tiny, luscious buffer between you and.....everything. So words that would hurt you when you're stone-sober just don't bother you after a glass or two of wine, or after you've lost three more pounds, or as long as chocolate or pizza can keep you company, keeping you safe and distant. But you take away those things and all of a sudden, you find many of your relationships very different than you originally believed. You feel everything. Everything." And she is correct, you do feel everything and see things from a different view. Her words helped me see that I often let others write my story and I was reminded only G-d should be writing my story. Shauna Niequist also writes "One new thing that began to emerge: as I stopped ignoring my exhaustion and burying some of the brokenness in my relationships, I started to have opinions. I mean, OPINIONS. I've always had opinions, certainly. But I've always been surrounded by people with strong opinions, too. And I 've learned a very complicated geometry about which things I'm “allowed” to feel strongly about, so much so that I often bent under the weight of so many other peoples' strongly held opinions," This is true of me and over the last year I am learning more to stand and not bend. I am also learning to feel feelings and not stuff them. Learning that G-d placed inside of me some of the very things I have pushed away, in fear of others opinions. Learning that transformation is not about the latest diet, but about changing from the inside out. Learning to let Jesus heal the places I have only allowed food to touch.
And it is all of this, that makes this time different.