When I prayed about my one word, be, for 2015 and decided that I would focus on a different be every month, I never imagined the places it would take me each month.
My weight loss journey has been filled with God transforming me inside out, with the last 18 months being extremely difficult, transformation has been slow physically, but God has continued to work mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
This kind of work is HARD!!!!! Can't I just transform physically without dealing with the stuff???
This month's inside work has been the hardest. I have dealt with OCD, anxiety, and at times depression type tendencies before in my life and the events, circumstances, and changes lately have come crashing down on me causing the tendencies to increase. I feel like I am suffocating beneath the stuff.
I have made the decision to work through some of my stuff with a counselor, he gave me some homework and from the work I found my focus for July. I was reading through the homework sheets that I felt like were pressing issues for me, including grief recovery (check out his site here, the sheet I read is from http://www.hopefortheheart.org/). One sentence stuck out at me.... "God made you to be resilient by equipping you to adapt mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to new situations." I made a note on the paper, I don't feel that I am, therefore bringing me my focus for July....Be resilient.
According to Merrian-Webster resilient means:
- able to become strong, healthy, or successful again after something bad happens
- able to return to an original shape after being pulled, stretched, pressed, bent, etc
- capable of withstanding shock without permanent deformation or rupture
- tending to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change
