Thursday, October 18, 2012

Consumed by Fear

When things seem uncontrollable do you allow yourself to become enveloped with fear?  Do you become anxious?  Constantly questioning yourself?

If your husband is late getting home, what are the thoughts in your head?  Your child gets sick, do you tend to wonder what if?  You have a to do list a mile long, do you get anxious about it? Do you have a conversation with someone and analyze the whole thing over and over?  Your house is not clean, do you stress about getting it done? You walk into a room, are you comparing yourself to those around you?  Does everything have to be or feel  "perfect" and "in control" ?  Do you have a hard time letting go and letting God??

I get so caught up in fear and anxiety, so much so I miss out on just being in the moment.  In the days prior to surgery I allowed fear to consume me.  I had difficulty looking at the facts.  I do this in everyday life.  I allow feelings to dictate my reactions, instead of allowing Jesus to hold me in His care. My emotions get the best of me most days.  He tells us to give Him our anxious thoughts.  I printed off verses, had verses texted to me and I repeated them over and over. One friend even gave me a precious cross to hold!  I looked back at life and remembered moments of God's faithfulness.  When what ifs took over  I gave them to Jesus. 

In everyday moments I want to apply this lesson to my life. I do not want what ifs, fear, emotions, and stress to rule my life.   This surgery, this time of rest that was provided for me, was a reminder that soaking up the truth of the Word of God will drown out the fear and anxiety in my life.

If I can allow God to help me soak up His truth in regards to a surgical procedure, I know I can allow Him to help me soak up His truth everyday, every moment.  It is so hard to surrender and go with the flow.  But He is in control. 

He has my back if I let Him!