Six years of words I spent one year with.
I have had several words scrawled on a piece of paper that I have
been praying through. I even discussed a few with my counselor. I don't
announce or commit to my word, until I process it through writing. As I
began this post earlier this month, it dawned on me that this will be the 7th year I have focused on
one word for one year. This seems significant, no it is significant.
The significance has made it harder for me to complete my post regarding my word for this year. I started the post, but my word never felt confirmed and the words that I had written weren’t quite connecting with my soul. These one word posts have always been easy to write. I took the lack of confirmation, connection, and difficulty I was having as the Lord saying wait. The wait is over.
Studying Hebrew for the last few years, I have learned that each letter pictures something and has a number value. I would love to linger with you over coffee, telling you the many wonders I have learned from studying the language of the Bible, but for the focus of this post, I will share just a snippet from one letter. The letter that is 7 in the Hebrew aleph-bet is zayin (ז). There are numerous truths to learn from this letter and it's value. It pictures a weapon and it’s form represents a sword. It also symbolizes Shabbat. Shabbat is the day of rest, the seventh day of the week. It begins on sundown Friday and ends on sundown Saturday. The picture of rest and fighting in this one letter inspires me. We have to fight, we need to put in work, but we need rest. We can't be ready for battle if we have not rested.
On February 1, I finished listening to a sermon by Michael Todd with Transformation Church. (You can listen to that sermon, here.) In his message, the word resolve slapped me in the face a dozen or more times. I am pretty sure I can still see the imprint on my cheek or maybe I am just feeling the sting.
I hesitated to consider this word at first, because there was a word I wanted to use. I liked the meaning, it resonated with me, but it was never confirmed. I was reluctant because resolve seems so similar to diligent, the word I just focused on. However, with every impact the word resolve grew roots in my heart, soul, and mind.
Resolve means a firm determination to do something, to form a purpose. Michael Todd stated in his sermon, "resolve is greater then results." I think my face just got slapped again typing those words. I tend to focus on the results in some areas. I don't start writing the blog post, chapter, or book out of concern for the conclusion and burden of perfection.I want the healing that needs to occur, but I don't want to feel the pain. I easily get discouraged in my health journey, because I am focused on the end. I can be result minded, not process inclined.
I have to make a resolve. A resolve to take up the weapon and rest that the letter zayin teaches and apply it to my life and what G-d has for me. Life requires battles. It requires rest. I need to resolve to do both. Michael Todd states, "if you workout always looking for the result it will discourage the work." I don't want to discourage the work I am made for. I don't want to discourage the work G-d wants to do. This year I want to be resolve minded. It is in this 7th year that I can fight, put in the work, and rest to allow me to have purpose in my moments, create habits that transform, and glean wisdom along the way. Going through the process and not around will create a result. I can't have a result, if I don't have a resolve.